the preconditions
22 March 2010
All of us do handle their emotions their own way. To cry starts suddenly. Laugh also. Both are physical reactions of the body of something funny or a dramatic event we suddenly encounter. There are more examples like that. Yawning is one, blushing or scaring are others. In that way, emotions are to compare with milestones who mark our lives. After years we suddenly encounter emotional events from long ago. According as we grow older, this chain of memories expands more and more.
Especially this kind of happenings evoke my thought, that this looks like a kind of a process. Like making a bonfire is in fact starting a process. Because that bonfire only exists if we have something that will burn. Like wood or paper. And only if we have a lighter or matches and enough oxygen, the process of burning starts. Nothing happens if we have not all these 'preconditions' available and fulfilled. So are we also able to extinguish the fire by foam, water or a blanket etc.
This all makes clear that there are preconditions to be fulfilled that starts, maintains or ends a process. Growing older looks to me, as if almost everything within and around me seems to be in such 'a process'. So it is not only an emotional happening, that looks like that! We see it in recycling rubbish, in the amount of natural gas, the climate changes and even in the expanding universe. The result of all these processes are a permanent transformation of what was. The result of the bonfire is, that some ashes are left over. The wood has been transformed in warmth and ashes, so permanently in 'something else'.
the big question
They discovered more of the preconditions to process their emotional experiences satisfactory. Some of these are: the curiosity why things happen to us as they do; to respect each others vision and wording without judging; the self responsibility of each individual, without disqualifying age or sex; to present caring aware attention (again without judging or intervene); to get reciprocally the same amount of time as speaker and as listener: the one who witnesses with respect and without intervene that process of wording thoughts.
And besides and above the common preconditions mentioned here, are also specific personal conditions to be mentioned. Respect for one's autonomy preserve those sometimes very personal preconditions. Here also the absence of any authoritarian behaviour is essential. So the general preconditions for the CCI process are: respect (each individual is valued), self-responsibility (I take care for my own process) and privacy (personal emotional expressions are never referred to and stay confidential).
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